Does it advertise one's failure? The incapability of finding someone on your own that would love you enough to stay with you? Or is it the insecurity of being trapped with someone who has been a complete stranger. Or is it that the word Arranged symbolises and concretes the absence of love?!
Somehow, for reasons unknown, I have come to fear this. Not for the above mentioned reasons but for the fact that since I have come to understanding things, love has been the most integral part of everything. Of all the decisions I have made, of all the triggered emotions and in a general out look towards day to day life.
And the concept of arranging something whose true essence is just love and companionship, it is like fighting against my own instincts, my very beliefs. And this makes me highly uncomfortable.
It's like a constant battle.
I just hope I win this against me. For if I loose this one,I know for sure, there won't be any zeal to fight any other.